via money.cnn.com

1 part Irish whiskey

1 part Irish cream

1/2 pint Guinness

1 spider (any species)

Preparation: Pour the whiskey and cream into a shot glass, fill a pint glass half-full with Guinness, drop the shot glass into the pint, drop a spider into the pint immediately after, give the concoction to an unsuspecting neighbor, watch as they give it back because there’s a spider in the drink.

Hey Mazda, how ’bout you stop putting spiders in your engines? Then you wouldn’t have to spend all that money recalling your cars and de-bugging them. You see what I did there? Here’s more pun-related fun for no reason whatsoever.

I’m not really sure what Mazda’s thinking. How does that happen? So your manufacturing facility has an infestation of Yellow Sac spiders? That weave webs in your evaporative canister vent lines? That can cause your fuel tanks to leak? Be more careful next time.

In other spider-related news: the Spiders beat the Hawks last night 69-54. Go Spiders!

And this is what happens when you give spiders drugs:

If you say that’s the way it is, then that’s the way it is.

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